I’m not crazy, I just have a mental illness.

I have a mental illness.   I cried when I said it. I thought- what me, no! I just have an eating disorder.   But that is a mental illness.   I started to feel so ashamed, and even more ashamed that I felt ashamed because fuck the stigma, right? I then realized when I […]

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2016: The Year of Gratitude & Transformation

So the whole idea of New Year’s Eve has never been that exciting to me. Sure, for the last 8 years 80% of the reason I didn’t go out or complained about going out was because of my eating disorder- but aside from that I just never thought it was a big deal. This year, […]

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A Letter to Myself

Repost from WEGO Health HAWMC   Alright so I have to make up for day 3 as well as day 4. Yupp…3 days in I didn’t last. But oh well, had to listen to my body and I needed rest. So day 3 was to free write about a quote. I love quotes. I have […]

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Shout-out to the Online Health Community!

REPOST from WEGO Health HAWMC   What drives me to write about my health….   Each week I walk into my treatment center and see at least 6 new girls. Each week.   There are endless studies on how girls as young as first grade are now worrying about their bodies, feeling fat and holding […]

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People > Stairmaster

I’m starting to finally want to go out, I want to dance, I want to hang out with other people, I want to have fun! But oh shit…I have no friends. Yup, I’m owning it. I’m not even apologizing- because it happens ALL THE TIME to people with eating disorders. Isolation is huge, the body becomes priority […]

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ED 101: 5 Things You’re Talking About That Derail Recovery

For a long time, I tried to ‘deal’ with peoples’ comments about food, weight, the gym, my body, others’ bodies, etc. Actually, during my eating disorder, I would hear certain comments and shut down, get pissed or completely isolate without really even realizing. In treatment, I gained the awareness that these comments were triggering, but I […]

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With Breakdowns Come Breakthroughs

It’s terrifying when the eating disorder tries to take back control. Recently, I noticed my face was looking fat. I have never focused on my face, I’ve never really worried about it being fat, and yet as I went to snapchat my friend I became fixated on how round my face was. When I finally […]

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ED 101: The Basics

So for those who are completely new to the world of eating disorders, whether you’re a support trying to learn and be there for your loved one or you simply are just trying to educate yourself- there are some basic words we use in the eating disorder community that you’ll hear fairly often. 1. ED- […]

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ED 101: The ED Voice

Well first off, ED stands for eating disorder. It may seem obvious but I promise you, to many it’s not (and that’s okay I am not shitting on them, it takes experience to know it!)   So back to ED 101- what is the eating disorder voice? Generally, all us cool kids in therapy have […]

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The Night Before the Beach…

It’s a terrifying situation- I mean a. being social is still a new thing for me and b. I’m going to be half naked. But recovery is all about challenges and breakthroughs. If I don’t face this now, I’m never going to get better and five years from now, I will still be brainstorming excuses to get out of  beach days with my friends. 

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